The Joker and his Midnight Tokers.

The Dark Knight was incredible. Heath was amazing.

...but I'll be damned if there isn't some MAJOR postmortem ass kissing going on.

I'm sad to say I overdosed (ouch!) on hype before seeing it myself.

"A fantastic representation of the Joker!" Totally.

"Way better than Jack!" Better makeup than Jack.

"Insanely disturbing!" If this is your first PG-13 movie experience, let me tell ya, the bad guys do more than twirl their mustaches in these flicks! You might wanna sit down for this one!

"He was on prescribed medication (that ultimately killed him) because he was so tormented by the role." Maybe he was tormented by the roll...I got a sub once and they put it on some sort of garlic/onion roll. I was tormented by smell of my ass for the rest of the night.

"Guaranteed Oscar!" If you're one of the people going around saying this, you probably went right out and put a trendy memorial sticker on your car when some random kid in your high school wrapped his around a tree.

Anyhow, sorry if I've taken your lord and savior's name in vain, people...but, really, that name is Heathcliff. Quit being so silly.

Ready, aim...ejaculate!

This is your lucky day
for any time you wish to spray
your bodily fluids my way...

I will lie down on my bed
tuck my legs behind my head
and I will gladly spread.
...but do not be misled
my bulls-eye is pink, with touch of brown, not red.

six-word Starbucks reviews

Lemonade Blended Beverage
Cold, chunky, lemon scented corn syrup.

Grande sugar-free Vanilla Latte, "skinny," no foam
Muddy water for cuntish old hags.

Mocha Frappuccino
A coffee-esque, toilet flavored McDonalds milkshake.

Starbucks Brewed Coffee
Ground fresh...bagged, shipped...served stale.

Caramel Macchiato
Celebrate your appreciation of tooth decay.